SalarySwishSalarySwish
Forums/Armchair-GM

What PIT Armchairs feel like (Parody)

Created by: LicMysak
Team: 2017-18 Pittsburgh Penguins
Initial Creation Date: Jan. 29, 2018
Published: Jan. 29, 2018
Salary Cap Mode: Basic
Trades
1.
PIT
  1. 2018 2nd round pick (CBJ)
  2. 2018 3rd round pick (CBJ)
CBJ
  1. Cole, Ian
Additional Details:
He plays for Pittsburgh. Check.
That means he's worth a shit load yayyyyyyyy.
So what if he gets scratched? That means nothing cuz our defense is stacked!
2.
PIT
  1. 2018 1st round pick (VGK)
VGK
  1. Hagelin, Carl
Additional Details:
Skate fast = high ass value
3.
EDM
  1. 2018 1st round pick (PIT)
  2. 2018 1st round pick (VGK)
  3. 2019 1st round pick (PIT)
  4. 2020 1st round pick (PIT)
Additional Details:
Trading a lot of 1sts get you the best players.
4.
PIT
  1. Liljegren, Timothy
  2. van Riemsdyk, James
  3. 2018 1st round pick (TOR)
TOR
  1. Letang, Kris
Additional Details:
Cap dump and we get some goodies as well cuz why not. Toronto need a #1 RHD. I think? Idk idc
DraftRound 1Round 2Round 3Round 4Round 5Round 6Round 7
2018
Logo of the TOR
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the CBJ
Logo of the CBJ
Logo of the VAN
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the DET
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the PIT
2019
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the MIN
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the PIT
2020
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the PIT
Logo of the PIT
ROSTER SIZESALARY CAPCAP HITOVERAGES TooltipBONUSESCAP SPACE
24$75,000,000$66,777,080$50,000$3,215,000$8,222,920
Left WingCentreRight Wing
$4,250,000$4,250,000
LW, RW
M-NTC
UFA - 1
$925,000$925,000 (Performance Bonus$2,850,000$3M)
C
UFA - 1
$6,800,000$6,800,000
RW
M-NTC, NMC
UFA - 5
$734,167$734,167 (Performance Bonus$182,500$182K)
LW, RW
UFA - 2
$9,500,000$9,500,000
C
NMC
UFA - 5
$4,250,000$4,250,000
RW
M-NTC
UFA - 1
$3,000,000$3,000,000
LW, RW
UFA - 3
$8,700,000$8,700,000
C
NMC
UFA - 8
$640,000$640,000
RW, LW
UFA - 1
$612,500$612,500
C, RW
UFA - 1
$2,075,000$2,075,000
LW, C
UFA - 1
$1,125,000$1,125,000
RW
UFA - 1
$650,000$650,000
C
UFA - 1
$692,500$692,500 (Performance Bonus$182,500$182K)
RW, LW
UFA - 1
$625,000$625,000
RW
UFA - 1
Left DefenseRight DefenseGoaltender
$4,100,000$4,100,000
LD
UFA - 6
$5,500,000$5,500,000
RD
UFA - 3
$3,750,000$3,750,000
G
UFA - 3
$3,333,225$3,333,225
LD
UFA - 5
$650,000$650,000
RD
UFA - 2
$675,000$675,000
G
UFA - 2
$2,250,000$2,250,000
LD
UFA - 3
$925,000$925,000
RD
RFA - 5
$964,688$964,688
LD/RD
UFA - 1

Embed Code

  • To display this team on another website or blog, add this iFrame to the appropriate page
  • Customize the height attribute in the iFrame code below to fit your website appropriately. Minimum recommended: 400px.

Text-Embed

Click to Highlight
Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:42 p.m.
#1
Avatar of the user
Joined: Dec. 2017
Posts: 2,406
Likes: 319
The others I haven't seen but damn is that Leafs trade spot on! Lol
exo2769 liked this.
Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:44 p.m.
#2
Avatar of the user
Joined: Jan. 2018
Posts: 70
Likes: 8
laugh laugh laugh
Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:45 p.m.
#3
Avatar of the user
Joined: Jun. 2015
Posts: 15,922
Likes: 6,981
Letang is worth more than the leafs trade lol please don’t say he’s a cap dump... do not base ONE bad season for a players trade value. You know how many stars have had bad seasons and people write them off like they suck now? Get a larger sample size please
MajesticWalrus liked this.
Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:45 p.m.
#4
LongtimeLeafsufferer
Avatar of the user
Joined: Jul. 2015
Posts: 60,924
Likes: 23,463
Edited Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:51 p.m.
The fact that Cole was scratched means he is well rested.....his value is instantly rises.
exo2769 liked this.
Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:47 p.m.
#5
Stars
Avatar of the user
Joined: May 2017
Posts: 775
Likes: 62
Quoting: mhockey91
Letang is worth more than the leafs trade lol please don’t say he’s a cap dump... do not base ONE bad season for a players trade value. You know how many stars have had bad seasons and people write them off like they suck now? Get a larger sample size please


Biased opinion spotted laugh
Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:48 p.m.
#6
Avatar of the user
Joined: Dec. 2017
Posts: 124
Likes: 31
This is great! lol Only thing you forgot was retaining half of McDavid's salary for an additional 5th round pick!
Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:49 p.m.
#7
Avatar of the user
Joined: Jun. 2015
Posts: 15,922
Likes: 6,981
Quoting: Starsfan98
Biased opinion spotted laugh


Okay lol. You haven’t watched letang throughout the years to know he’s an elite defensemen. One bad season doesn’t project to meaning he’s a bad player...
MajesticWalrus liked this.
Jan. 29, 2018 at 4:49 p.m.
#8
Avatar of the user
Joined: Jun. 2015
Posts: 15,922
Likes: 6,981
Quoting: mhockey91
Okay lol. You haven’t watched letang throughout the years to know he’s an elite defensemen. One bad season doesn’t project to meaning he’s a bad player... so many clueless hockey fans on this site.
Jan. 29, 2018 at 5:24 p.m.
#9
Lafreniere
Avatar of the user
Joined: Aug. 2017
Posts: 1,941
Likes: 305
(1) That Cole trade is actually fair. Re: Brendan Smith

(2) Pens say hell no to the Letang trade

(3) Pens fans don’t overvalue Hagelin THAT much. Honesty, I wouldn’t trade Hagelin for picks right now(unless for someone reason the pick is a 1st laugh). He’s playing great.

(4) Where do you get that Pens fans send picks for the best player? Link for that. EDIT: I just saw that Kuch for three 1sts laugh
MajesticWalrus and mhockey91 liked this.
Jan. 29, 2018 at 5:30 p.m.
#10
Avatar of the user
Joined: Jun. 2015
Posts: 15,922
Likes: 6,981
Quoting: ShafferPens
(1) That Cole trade is actually fair. Re: Brendan Smith

(2) Pens say hell no to the Letang trade

(3) Pens fans don’t overvalue Hagelin THAT much. Honesty, I wouldn’t trade Hagelin for picks right now(unless for someone reason the pick is a 1st laugh). He’s playing great.

(4) Where do you get that Pens fans send picks for the best player? Link for that. EDIT: I just saw that Kuch for three 1sts laugh


Agreed. I wouldn’t move hagalin till the end of the season and I’d let hornqvist walk so we’d have TONS of cap space to play around with
Jan. 29, 2018 at 5:31 p.m.
#11
Avatar of the user
Joined: Aug. 2017
Posts: 3,025
Likes: 351
Quoting: ShafferPens
(1) That Cole trade is actually fair. Re: Brendan Smith

(2) Pens say hell no to the Letang trade

(3) Pens fans don’t overvalue Hagelin THAT much. Honesty, I wouldn’t trade Hagelin for picks right now(unless for someone reason the pick is a 1st laugh). He’s playing great.

(4) Where do you get that Pens fans send picks for the best player? Link for that. EDIT: I just saw that Kuch for three 1sts laugh


@boltscharge17

Mcdavid is oilers only generational talent. Kucherov is more realistic because tampa has more than one. And the point of that thread was to show a certain number pf firsts can get the job done. Another reason your mcdavid thing is bas is because gretzly didnt even get that much
Jan. 29, 2018 at 5:33 p.m.
#12
Lafreniere
Avatar of the user
Joined: Aug. 2017
Posts: 1,941
Likes: 305
Quoting: mhockey91
Agreed. I wouldn’t move hagalin till the end of the season and I’d let hornqvist walk so we’d have TONS of cap space to play around with

If he keeps his play up, I’d keep him unless we get an offer that blows our socks off or we need a cap dump for an elite player.
Quoting: MajesticWalrus
@boltscharge17

Mcdavid is oilers only generational talent. Kucherov is more realistic because tampa has more than one. And the point of that thread was to show a certain number pf firsts can get the job done. Another reason your mcdavid thing is bas is because gretzly didnt even get that much


Kucherov isn’t realistic at all, dude. Kucherov is working his way up to generational in my books. Dude is crazy good.
Jan. 29, 2018 at 5:46 p.m.
#13
Thread Starter
Banned
Avatar of the user
Joined: Mar. 2017
Posts: 7,712
Likes: 2,820
Quoting: MajesticWalrus
@boltscharge17

Mcdavid is oilers only generational talent. Kucherov is more realistic because tampa has more than one. And the point of that thread was to show a certain number pf firsts can get the job done. Another reason your mcdavid thing is bas is because gretzly didnt even get that much


Kucherov is more realistic. Haha. Wait, you're serious right? Of course you are. And 15M in Pocklington's pocket made him cash in on Gretzky
Jan. 29, 2018 at 6:29 p.m.
#14
jimmmyg
Avatar of the user
Joined: Mar. 2017
Posts: 737
Likes: 191
Edited Jan. 31, 2018 at 10:06 a.m.
df
Jan. 29, 2018 at 6:34 p.m.
#15
Go Habs Go
Avatar of the user
Joined: Mar. 2017
Posts: 10,668
Likes: 4,100
While I don't approve of these types of posts, I do appreciate that you tagged it as parody in the title.
Jan. 29, 2018 at 6:44 p.m.
#16
Avatar of the user
Joined: Dec. 2017
Posts: 124
Likes: 31
You need to do one for Montreal next with all the crazy Pacioretty, Weber, Petry and especially Alzner trades I see!
Jan. 29, 2018 at 6:53 p.m.
#17
Avatar of the user
Joined: Nov. 2016
Posts: 2,933
Likes: 362
Quoting: jimmmyg
This joke is just as funny the 400th time around. Jesus you guys are all ******* losers on here


********losers on here you say. you're on this site too. jus to let you know, I am thirty two years old, and had a girlfriend once, hardly a loser.
 
Reply
To create a post please Login or Register
Question:
Options:
Add Option
Submit Poll